Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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