Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
