Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
