i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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