kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize
