yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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