? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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