i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Randomize
