also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
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Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
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Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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