Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Randomize
