drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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