used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
