can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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