Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
