we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
