my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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