For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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