Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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