I showed him my bush... on skype.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
