i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
