so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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