She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
