They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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