talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.