She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
you made out with another girl for some wings
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
