haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
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