Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
