how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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