I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
