Don't you send me to vm
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Randomize
