my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Damn victory sex feels great
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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