guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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