Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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