How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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