I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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