Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
You took a bar mat shot.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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