We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Im part way to drunk.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
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