I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm šš»š
We are so blessed
Everything isnāt always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes thereās tequila.
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