Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
