I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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