Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
