either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
