I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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