This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
vagina is talking i cant
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
You pole danced in your parka.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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