I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I need a hoe opinion
go on
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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