dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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