She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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