WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
