I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
