I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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